If you only knew

I have these "friends", if I can even can them friends
They do not understand why I don't want to go out with them,
not because I don't like them, but I don't wanna spend my time outside
I am better alone, at home, watching my favorite shows, writing, reading.
Those stuff are the things that makes me feel fine.

When I am with other people I feel anxious
I feel the need to fit in
I feel I have to exert so much effort just for them to like me.
...and it makes me very anxious.

I dont think I belong to any group.
I belong to myself, I belong to my daughter
...and that, they dont understand.

:(